Katie Holmes’s Journal Entry on the Day Dark Knight is Released
July 18, 2008
Tom and I just got back from dinner at Orso’s, which was very nice. The maître d’ forgot to play the Mission Impossible theme through the stereo as he escorted us to our table, but Tom didn’t freak out too much. During dinner, Tom saw Dayton, one of his friends from Church. Dayton made a joke about Brooke Shields and Tom laughed for an hour and forty-seven minutes straight. The food was good. I know Tom especially liked his tiramisu because he did his whole pumping his fists in the air and screaming ‘YES!’ at the top of his lungs thing after each bite.
This afternoon I went to see Dark Knight, and it was definitely as good as everyone’s been saying. It was tough getting a ticket though, not just cause they were selling out, but because I’ve been on CruiseControl (Tom’s way of saying house arrest) ever since he caught me taking a children’s Tylenol when I had a 104 degree fever. I tried explaining it was only a mild painkiller, but he ripped the bottle from my hand and recited his entire speech from A Few Good Men (including Jack Nicholson’s parts).
Anyway…even though the film was great, I know
TomI made the right decision to drop out. There’s no way I could’ve handledTom screaming everyday that he’d show Christian Bale who the real American psycho wasthe stress of the shoot along with raising Suri, or as Tom likes to call her, TomKitten. There will always be offers for other movies, but how many times can a mother see her newborn take her first steps, speak her first words, or get a purification séance by several strange men in hooded cloaks? The answer is not many, since the hydrochloric “cleanse formula” can be harmful upon repeated exposure (the thetan-doctors said the “burns” are just her impurities evaporating into space.)Come to think of it, I’m still not entirely sure how I got pregnant. I remember saying that I thought we should be married before having a child, but Tom seemed really eager to
prove that he’s not gaystart a family. Then I remember having this strange dream where I was lying in a dark room with people chanting (the men in hooded cloaks?) and Tom was cackling while having sex with me. When I woke up, I felt ill and had scratch marks on my body, and a few days later found out I was pregnant. I wonder if this has anything to do with Tom destroying that Rosemary’s Baby DVD we had?I can’t say I didn’t feel nostalgic watching Dark Knight, maybe even a little jealous,
maybe suicidal,but I guess part of being a mother means making sacrifices for yourhusbandchild. Like missing out on the “best superhero film of all-time,” or giving birth with a ball gag strapped firmly to your pharynx, or agreeing that your bedroom ceiling is a great place for a ten-foot mural of L. Ron Hubbard. But whenever Suri does that really cute peek-a-boo thing with her Cabbage Patch Kid, it totally makes me forget about the career and life I’ve left behind…I’m gonna fucking kill myself.
